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Posts tagged as “Music video”

Your mother is of such extreme proportions that…

March 10, 2010 |

Thoughts

A few days ago a user on Reddit started a thread for nerdy “Yo’ Mama” jokes, and it’s delightful.

Here are a few of my favorites.

Your momma’s so fat that you can see whats behind her due to gravitational lensing.

The woman who carried you in her womb for your gestation period and later expelled you from her vagina has such an excess of adipose tissue that one could reap cardiovascular benefits simply from taking a brisk walk around her person.

#you parent.female {width:120%; border-bottom:thick; padding:0 auto; max-width:auto; size:landscape;}

Your mother is so fat that the assertion “she sits around the house” may be interpreted literally rather than figuratively.

There’s also a good deal of laughing to be done on the comments all the other nerds leave about the jokes. It’s like 12 levels of nerdiness deep and I love it.

Here’s the original thread.

Of course, you can’t drop Yo Mama jokes without reminding me of this gem by the Pharcyde.

> Continue reading...Your mother is of such extreme proportions that…

Morbid Angel’s Domination

March 8, 2010 |

About Music and Music

In a day when there were only two cores—hard and grind— and before anyone crabwalked their way through a music video, before there was a scene for which there could be hair, before anyone auto-tuned the clean vocals in their songs, Morbid Angel released an album called Domination. The year was 1995 and I was 13 years old. I had been listening to Morbid Angel for some time at this point. I owned 1989’s Altars of Madness and 1991’s Blessed Are The Sick, but it was their third album, 1993’s Covenant that was the important one. I have no idea how many times I’ve listened to this album, but it must be in the healthy triple digits. The count was probably into the triple digits when Domination came out in 95. It was right up there with Vulgar Display of Power and Chaos A.D.

I listened the living hell out of that record. In case you are somewhere around my age and are unfamiliar with Covenant but you were around to see Beavis & Butthead, then you might recognize this video.

Pretty killer song right?

I know it is.

And then Domination came out and for some reason I thought they’d gone soft on me. I was disappointed with the album and it never really enter heavy rotation the same way that Covenant had. The songs were weak and soft. They basically made a fucking pussy ass country record I thought. I felt betrayed, so Domination was lodged into the back of my brain as Morbid Angel’s failed mid-career attempt at selling out.

Then a few weeks ago, I decided I’d give their “new” record a shot. Of course, this was early 2010, 15 years after its release. Morbid Angel had released three records afterward, yet in my head, for whatever reason, Domination was still the “new” one. Weird how that happens.

And, wow. Was I wrong in my opinions of the album. Domination fucking SLAYS. Perhaps you’d be interested in hearing the song that pretty much convinced me that Morbid Angel had gone soft on this record? Here it is.

What the hell? Was I serious? Something in me thought that this wasn’t heavy enough? “Where The Slime Live” is an amazing song, yet 13-year-old Joe thought it was total pussy crap. I was an idiot! In all likelihood I still am!

In case the sample wasn’t enough, here are a couple more tracks from the record I had dismissed as not heavy enough.

[audio:https://www.theblacklaser.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/01-Dominate.mp3|titles=Dominate|Artists=Morbid Angel] [audio:https://www.theblacklaser.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/05-Nothing-But-Fear.mp3|titles=Nothing But Fear|Artists=Morbid Angel] [audio:https://www.theblacklaser.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/10-Inquisition.mp3|titles=Inquisition (Burn With Me)|Artists=Morbid Angel] [audio:https://www.theblacklaser.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/11-Hatework.mp3|titles=Hatework|Artists=Morbid Angel]

Yeah. I know. Totally soft right?

I think I’ve proven myself here. If you’ve got some old records around that you maybe didn’t get into the first, give them a listen. You might be pleasantly surprised by what you hear.

> Continue reading...Morbid Angel’s <i>Domination</i>

Pulp, and why have I never, until yesterday, seen a music video by them?

February 19, 2010 |

About Music, Music and Music Videos

I’ve been listening to Pulp for, oh, about a million years. The This Is Hardcore/Different Class duo were some of my most listened-to records between ’98 and ’00. It was a period where heavy metal music was stagnating under the ridiculous weight of Nü-metal and I started to explore lighter music. I got way into the pop and other rock coming out of the British Isles, bands like Blur, Supergrass, Pulp, Gomez, Radiohead. These guys and girls were carrying the torch of classic British pop rock music in the vein of The Kinks or The Zombies or any number of other bands. They were writing catchy as hell tunes with a light-hearted sensibility that nevertheless held a tiny shade of darkness below all the major chords and joyful harmonies.

No band exemplified that light/dark condition like Pulp did on 1996’s Different Class. The record features a bunch of upbeat poppy tracks propelled by Cocker’s sharp, biting lyrics. The songs are filled longing and remorse and shame expressed with witty jabs, all bouncing along to a brisk, danceable beat.

Then they released This Is Hardcore in 1998 which is Different Class’s sleazier, darker, less poppy older brother. Lacking the supreme dancey-ness of its predecessor, it’s also a whole lot darker. No, that’s not exactly right. The darkness is a lot more apparent.

Neither record is better than the other. They’ve been in heavy rotation in my listening habits for a long time and I’m still not sick of them. What I think I really love is that the songs are like Jarvis Cocker having a conversation with the listener, like he’s telling us a story. He allows his thoughts to linger and spread and chooses the right word even if he doesn’t rhyme.

I could write a whole bunch of other stuff here, but I won’t. Just listen to the music.

Ok. So, I’m a fan. Doy. You would think that I would have seen all their music videos, right? Me too. But until yesterday I hadn’t seen a single one. What the hell is that about? At the very least, I guess it’s because when I became a fan of Pulp there was no place like YouTube to see all their videos. It was an age when MTV no longer played videos and there was no good way for me to see the videos a medium-sized British band were making.

Well, now I’ve got YouTube, so I can watch whatever I want! I present to you, dear reader, every decent Pulp video I can find.

Enjoy!

> Continue reading...Pulp, and why have I never, until yesterday, seen a music video by them?

Hecq vs Exillion’s “Spheres of Fury”

October 25, 2009 |

Music and Music Videos

See this? This is exactly the style of thing I envisioned while discussing building a body of work. This video is super awesome. Let’s look at what you’d need to spend money on to recreate this.

  • Squirt guns
  • Smoke bomb
  • Lunch
  • Driving all these people out to a field

I was going to put “Costumes” on the list, but I know plenty of people who own clothes like this in real life, so there’d be no reason to dress them at all. Everything else is know-how. Of course, you could spend a fortune on something like this, but there’s no need to.

I’m willing to bet that it was shot on the 5DII or RedCam, more likely Red since the slow motion stuff is so silky smooth and there’s no rolling shutter on the flag. The super shallow depth of field is awesome. The grade is awesome. The cut is awesome. The concept is awesome. All in all, it’s fucking awesome. Totally inspiring.

> Continue reading...Hecq vs Exillion’s “Spheres of Fury”

New The Sword Album! New The Sword Album!

September 20, 2009 |

Music and Music Videos

So, I’m just sitting here at work on a Sunday night and it occurs to me that, by gum, I would really like to get a new record from The Sword. Really, it’s about damned time. Seriously. Anyway, a quick check of their Myspace page reveals that not only are they currently writing the new record, but IT’S GOING TO BE A CONCEPT ALBUM CENTERED AROUND A SCIENCE FICTION NARRATIVE.

Holy fucking fuck. It’s like that news was made specifically for me.

Here’s the video that sold me on The Sword in the first place.

> Continue reading...New The Sword Album! New The Sword Album!

This is the song that sold me on As I Lay Dying

July 4, 2009 |

Music and Music Videos

It wasn’t that they took their name from a Faulkner novel. Or that they’re Christians from San Diego. Or whatever. It’s this song. And more specifically the motherfucking double bass shit they throw down. So solid.

Sorry I’m not posting so much these days. Funemployment has some negative aspects. One is that I spend much less time at the computer. I promise, sooner or later once I have a more regular schedule established, I will get back to more regular postings. Love all 15 of you!

> Continue reading...This is the song that sold me on As I Lay Dying

Bloodbath’s “Hades Rising”

June 1, 2009 |

Music and Music Videos

A few months ago I did a little mini-review of Bloodbath’s The Fathomless Mastery. I expressed a bit of reservation about the quality of the record, but, as time passes and I’ve had the chance to give it repeated listenings, it’s fucking awesome. The album is now breaking any new ground, but that’s not the point at all. Bloodbath have created a massive, heavy as fuck, brutal death metal record of the old school style that I find so heartwarming. Totally awesome. Check it out.

This is a video for their first single (do death metal bands have singles?) called “Hades Rising”. It’s rad. Watch it.

> Continue reading...Bloodbath’s “Hades Rising”