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Posts published in “About Music”

Hello, Invisible Oranges readers!

June 1, 2010 |

About Music and Music

If you’re reading this, you’ve clicked the link on the post about me winning the Ryan Lipynsky Guitar World cover contest. Pretty sweet.

Here’s the winning entry for those of you who don’t read Invisible Oranges but have come here on your own.

I think my favorite part of the whole thing was picking the songs to be tabs. Regular readers will also recognize the claw I used as a bullet as the same from The Black Laser’s Seal of Approval. It’s my hand throwing what I call the metal claw, but which Cosmo Lee at Invisible Oranges called invisible oranges. Get it? I know you do.

Anyway, it was fun and I’m psyched to have won the record. The more metal, the better, I think.

And because harmonized growls WILL fuck your shit up, here’s an example of one of my favorites.

You’ll notice, too, that the tab for this song is included in my issue of Guitar World.

> Continue reading...Hello, Invisible Oranges readers!

My thoughts on the Gorguts/Krallice/Portal/Bloody Panda show I went to last night.

May 27, 2010 |

About Music and Music

I haven’t listened to Gorguts since their 1991 release Considered Dead, but when my new buddy Vince Neilstein of MetalSucks suggested I check out the show I figured I might as well. If nothing else it would be a rocking good time and metal as fuck.

Apart from what I perceived to be a little bit of sloppiness on the lead singer’s part, the rest of Gorguts was INCREDIBLY fucking tight. And, really, when did it ever matter if Death Metal was super tight anyway? Have you heard the first Deicide record? Early Morbid Angel? Who gives a shit? The band slayed. It was really great and I would definitely go see them again. They played a couple of new songs which they referred to only as “Number 3” followed by “Number 2”. I’m having a hard time deciding which of the two was my favorite, but I’m thinking that “Number 2” for sheer intensity wins out by a narrow margin. Altogether incredible. I will definitely pick up the record Gorguts will be releasing in 2011.

The set was surprising to me because I remember Considered Dead being a run-of-the-mill kind of Death Metal record. I still have it somewhere from when I bought it in what must have been 1993. It was never high in the rotation, but bands age and change and get better or worse. It’s worth a relisten.

And then there’s Krallice. Or, then there’s wasn’t Krallice, which was real strange because at least one of their members, Colin Marsten, was there playing bass for Gorguts. Maybe I missed them? I arrived just as Bloody Panda finished which was an hour and half into when the show was scheduled to start. Too bad. I was pretty excited to check them out.

For me, the real stand out of last night was Portal. I’d heard their name bantered about on the metal blogs and whatever, but I’d never listened to them. Before I get into a description of their set, let me preface with a few videos, ok? I mean, that’s why you come to The Black Laser, right? Videos?

The first is a live performance from 2008.

The second two are part of their set from the night before I saw them.

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK. The lead singer (vocalist?) throws the claw the entire set. The set was so offensively awesome that I can barely contain myself. Not knowing anything about the band, I don’t have much to write except my undying praise for them. I am a now a die-hard Portal fan for life. I’m going to order all of their records from Amazon today. God damned amazing, man. I’ve never seen a bassist play as fast as this guy did last night. And I love the theatricality of the whole thing. It’s evil as fuck and silly and serious and awesome. The lead singer (vocalist?!) dressed a lot like I’ve always imagined the Space Pope to look like, except more of a community theatre version. The real Space Pope would never wear a strap to keep his mitre on.

But, seriously, check them out. They have to be one of the heaviest bands I’ve ever seen live. It’s a blistering wall of devastation and everyone should listen to them. Wow. Just wow.

Joe Shivers, you missed out.

One last note. It made me laugh to recognize that as I write about this br00tal, kult as fuck metal show I went to last night, I’m jamming out to Major Lazer & La Roux’s Lazerproof which was released yesterday. Hah! How contradictory can one person be? But isn’t that part of what makes life fun and interesting?

> Continue reading...My thoughts on the Gorguts/Krallice/Portal/Bloody Panda show I went to last night.

Inspiration, The Impending Summer, and Change.

May 11, 2010 |

About Filmmaking, About Music, About Photography, About Writing, Film & TV, Music, Photography, Thoughts and Writing

Here I am on the tail end of some major life changes and I feel like something is missing. I’m settled in my new apartment, my finances have leveled out after the move, I’ve been working regularly, and playing a lot. The transition into this new phase is basically over and I’m starting to feel a little antsy about it. Not antsy about the transition, but antsy about what’s next. That familiar tightness in the chest is back, that feeling that I’m not doing enough, that I’m not creating enough, that I’m wasting such valuable time as I’ll never have again. Hedonism has become dull, a chore, a worn out play-thing destined for the bottom of the toy chest. All the playing is a nice distraction from life when I’m stressed and stupid and trying to avoid my feelings (as I’ve been doing since the beginning of February), but when I’m not really avoiding anything all the hedonism does is inspire feelings of guilt and shame. Loss? I don’t know. Maybe that’s too strong a word. It makes me feel bad and dumb.

After cranking out the piece for Hunter earlier this year and my subsequent rejection, there has been this tiny little whisper in my brain chanting its disheartening mantra of “Fuck it,” which is a terrible attitude to seeping through your subconscious. Astute Black Laserites will notice that I’ve posted nary a single photo all year. It’s May. You’ll also notice that I’ve not posted any other writing besides the Hunter piece. And that I’ve made ZERO progress on the three music videos I’ve assigned myself for this year. Pathetic. This year’s theme is flailing around, begging for attention, and I can’t seem to muster it. What is my deal? I’m trading my work time for play time as a way to rebound, but it’s not having the affect it should. Quite the opposite, I think.

With this warm weather anxiety firmly gripping my chest, I’ve been thinking of a few simple ways to change things up, to put my brain into a different place. Let’s explore, shall we?

  • Buy a bicycle – I really want one. I think it would be nice to have one to ride around on in the summer time. On the other hand, it’s been 15 years since I’ve ridden a bicycle regularly and riding one around NY scares me more than a little. It’s something I need to overcome.
  • Lose a little weight – Nothing drastic. Just a little. I could stand a little definition. It will help me feel better, no doubt. I don’t really know how to do this, but maybe the bike will help.
  • Read more – This is another weird thing. I think I’ve read maybe 2 or 3 books this year? Again, it’s May. That is a surprisingly low number for me. I like reading a lot. It makes my brain function better and helps me write.
  • Work less – I’ve been working nonstop since October and I’m ready not to work for a little. I can afford it. Thankfully, most of June and parts of July and August I’ll not be working. Super.
  • Pick up the guitar again – It’s been a million years since I owned and played a guitar regularly. I’d like to get one again and flex that part of my brain so long dormant.

All in all, not an insurmountable list. With any measure of diligence I should be able to accomplish these things and they will open the flood gates of my brain so that I might be able to get some damned work done when I’m not working. What is this crazy work compulsion I feel about? Weird. Anyway, I’d like to work more.

And lest this come off as some whiny bitch and moan session (it’s not intended to be), here’s something I find inspirational.

> Continue reading...Inspiration, The Impending Summer, and Change.

The Insane Clown Posse interviewed by The New York Times.

April 30, 2010 |

About Music, Music and Thoughts

It’s the interview you’ve been waiting your entire life to read. A few days ago, David Itzkoff interviewed the infamous Insane Clown Posse about all this attention they’ve been receiving lately. He delves right into all the fun that’s being made of them by basically the entire internet.

And you know what? They’re surprisingly good natured about the whole thing. When asked about Saturday Night Live’s lampooning of the Gathering of the Juggalos, they responded:

Shaggy 2 Dope, Insane Clown Posse: How can you be mad at “Saturday Night Live”? That’s what they do. They make parodies. They’re funny. That’s flattering, that you’re a large enough player in the game that “Saturday Night Live” even recognizes you.

Violent J: It felt incredible – like, wow, man, we’re on the radar.

You kind of expect them to be all pissed and up in arms about being made fun of so directly. But again, when asked about SNL’s Thrilla Killa Klownz parody of “Miracles”, they come right back and play the high hand.

Shaggy 2 Dope: I remember back in the day when Weird Al Yankovic did “Amish Paradise,” off Coolio’s “Gangsta Paradise.” Somehow Coolio got mad. If Weird Al wanted to do one of our songs, I’d be like, “Hell yeah.” To me, it’s the same thing with “Saturday Night Live.”

Violent J: When they did it again, I called my mom about that. It’s awesome.

And then again, when asked about my favorite question of theirs, “Fucking magnets, how do they work?!” they come back with an entirely reasonable, if not exactly enlightened, response.

Violent J: I know the stuff isn’t really miracles. I think we might have misused the word miracle. I think that might mean something that has happened with no explanation. These things we mentioned in the song, they can all be explained. But what we’re doing is appreciating them. Even the infamous line, “Magnets, how do they work?” I mean, yeah, we know how magnets work. But they’re still incredible. You can push something across the table without touching it. And as a kid, I found that fascinating. I still find that fascinating. [laughs]

Shaggy 2 Dope: Come on, a rock that pulls metal towards it or pushes it away? Yeah, it has to do with the magnetic polar caps and [stuff]. But for real? Come on, man. You’re just holding a U-shaped thing that pushes metal away or attracts metal or something. The North and South Pole makes a rock magnetic, and if you touch a piece of metal with it, that becomes magnetic? That’s crazy.

Amazing. Fucking amazing. Giraffes?

Of course, then there’s this gem.

Violent J: Songs like “Miracles,” they’re not new to ICP. We don’t restrict ourselves to just making murder songs. When we’re talking to the Juggalos, it’s not always about chop-chop, kill-‘em-up, you know? We’ve always done songs that we attempt to be meaningful and deep over our career.

You owe it to yourself to read the whole article here: Fools’ Gold: An Oral History of the Insane Clown Posse Parodies

> Continue reading...The Insane Clown Posse interviewed by The New York Times.

Death Metal Lyric or William Blake Quote?

April 20, 2010 |

About Music, About Writing, Music and Writing

I stole this from McSweeney’s. I’m not this clever.

1. “Drive your cart and your plow over the bones of the dead.”

2. “We are Satan’s generation.”

3. “As I was walking among the fires of hell, delighted.”

4. “The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom.”

5. “The child of burning time has gone. He hasn’t come back.”

6. “Flames of profligacy, naked bodies flowing in the stream of wild dreams.”

7. “The original Archangel or possessor of the command of the heavenly host, is called the Devil.”

8. “The sulphur-kingdom, purgatory, hell`s damnation, no man will be perditioned for all time.”

9. “Sooner murder an infant in its cradle than nurse unacted desires.”

10. “Every man is therefore guilty of all the good he did.”

The key is here. How many did you get right?

> Continue reading...Death Metal Lyric or William Blake Quote?

Serendipity and the remembering of things.

April 13, 2010 |

About Music, Music and Thoughts

Last night I was at The Belmont Lounge for my friend Dumaine’s birthday party. We arrived just a little after 8 right in the middle of some sort of unsigned R&B/hip hop artist showcase which sounded like an open mic, but wasn’t. Dumaine and his fye-ance Erika had reserved a table in anticipation of the friends who would eventually show up. A smart move, I think. We spoke to the hostess and got her to seat us at the table. Apparently, the woman running the showcase had placed some record company folks, whatever the HELL that means, at the table with the delicately lettered “Reserved” sign on it. When the hostess did her job and moved the record company folks to seat us, this woman raised a hell of a stink.

Instead of doing the right thing and saying, “Hey, you know, I know you have this table reserved and everything, but I would love for these folks to be able to see the rest of the show from here since I’d love for my performers to make some sort of deal with them. Would you mind if they stayed here?”

You know what we would have said? We’d have said, “Of course! No problem. There’s only three of us right now and we’d be happy to share the table for the remainder of the show.”

But, no. She had to pull the passive aggressive card and give us stink eye all night and bitch to the staff and call us out on the microphone. We were polite and didn’t let her bother us, because, really, what’s worse for people who are passive aggressive than to reply to them with straight positivity and politeness?

We sat and listened to the second half of the show. After 2 or 3 7 dollar Brooklyn Lager bottles (I know, right, what the fuck), I’m getting lost in my own head a little as all this not-very-good R&B blares through the bar. Conversation was impossible with the volume, so all I had was my own brain. Luckily, at this point, we’re friends.

I recognized that every song we heard was about how much the singer loved someone and how they either wanted to spend their lives with the other person or how they were the most beautiful in the world or how they wanted to take them home and sleep with them or whatever. You get it, I think. It was all hyperbole and adolescent descriptions of love and relationships. Kind of silly, really. Not realistic at all.

I got to thinking that it would be really awesome to do a song in the same style where the guy basically told the woman that she was all right, maybe a little annoying, but that he liked fucking her. That he didn’t want it to get too serious since he really couldn’t see them in a relationship. That he thought she was ok, but not really that great and, in the end, he didn’t care too much about her and that she’d probably be better off with someone who respected her. All of it sung in that “I can’t just hold a single note” style of modern R&B singers that I dislike so much. It’s like constant vocal gymnastics that seems to me more often cover up the fact that the singer’s not really hitting the note they’re trying to hit. Instead of just singing, they’re masking that they can’t sing. But whatever.

On the way in to work this morning I was thinking about the song still when I realized that I already KNEW a song like that. Funny, right? It took me 12 hours to process that the song I thought would be so funny pretty much exists. Here it is.

[audio:https://www.theblacklaser.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/Our-Love-Would-Be-Much-Better-If-I-Gave-A-Damn-About-You.mp3|artists=Dag|titles=Our Love Would Be Much Better (If I Gave a Damn About You)]

Now, the Dag track isn’t quite exactly perfect, but it’s pretty close. Do any of you brilliant people out there have any songs like this? Let’s start a collection!

> Continue reading...Serendipity and the remembering of things.