I am not a daily routine kind of person. I wish I was. I would love to learn how to have that sort of discipline. I’m sure I would get more done. Unfortunately, flying by the seat of my pants has worked out well enough for me so far that I have no great pressing reason to change, no matter how much my brain knows it’s a good idea to approach my work with a more regimented schedule. It’s kind of stressful knowing that I would be better off having a work schedule, but not having the discipline to enact it for longer than a few weeks at the most. Where does one learn this skill of self-discipline? Is it something inate? If that’s the case, I’m fucked. I’ve never been a good self-motivator and I am too easily distracted by whatever the hell is going on around me. Even right now, I’ve written, what?, eight sentences?, and already I want to get up and walk around and blah blah blah blah. What’s that shit about?
If it’s not innate, where can I learn it? Again, my history of getting by winging it about 95% of the time doesn’t help at all. Winging it is great when I have to fix the Avid or cut together an animatic for clients, but not so great for more serious work. I’ve got this built in perception that if I can’t nail it right away, that’s it’s either a) fucked or b) a shitty idea to begin with. Neither of those are very helpful for seeing something through to the end. How do I unlearn that unconscious tendency? How do I learn to feel good about the work I do so I can stand behind it and continue until it be thoroughly finished? I am always impressed with my friend Jesse who has this seemingly limitless capacity for sitting down and just hacking through what needs to be hacked through like a champion. It has certainly paid off for him thus far. Where the hell do I learn that shit?
This is something I think about a lot. It’s probably my major struggle as a creative person—how do I continue to create when I already have a fairly full schedule? How can I be a creative person? How can I be a productive person? How can I produce? Oh how these questions taunt me! I had it going for a minute earlier this month, but it’s lapsed again. I need to figure out how to get it going for longer than a week or two.
If you, humble reader, are like me, then it will be inspiring to you to read about other creative people and how they schedule themselves to create. Daily Routines – How writers, artists, and other interesting people organize their days. I really like Saul Bellow and Ingmar Bergman’s routines.