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Posts published in May 2010

The Black Laser on Twitter.

What? You didn’t know? For realz? Yes, The Black Laser is on Twitter. It’s been over in the sidebar for ages. I’ve only recently started exploring it for what it is, though, and I have to say I am having fun with it. It’s totally ridiculous. I don’t really think you can convey all that much worth caring about in 160 characters, but it’s fun to drop little lines of bullshit once in a while. If I need more than 160 characters…well, that’s what The Black Laser’s for, right?

I’ve discovered something about Twitter that I genuinely enjoy: hashtag games. If you don’t know, a hashtag is a little bit of extra text on a tweet that looks like this -> #theblacklaser. Users can then search by the hashtag. A hashtag game is when a lot of people post things using the same hashtag. I like to troll these games.

I know, I know. Joe, aren’t you a little old for trolling strangers on the interwebs? To that I say, No. Not at all. And besides, I’m not being mean, just fucking around. Here are some samples of what I mean.

See? Nothing rude. I just like to provide a little contrast to the mostly banal, boorish comments. It makes me laugh. If you’d like to play hashtag game trolling with me, follow me on the Twitter and we can play. It’s fun!

Inspiration, The Impending Summer, and Change.

Here I am on the tail end of some major life changes and I feel like something is missing. I’m settled in my new apartment, my finances have leveled out after the move, I’ve been working regularly, and playing a lot. The transition into this new phase is basically over and I’m starting to feel a little antsy about it. Not antsy about the transition, but antsy about what’s next. That familiar tightness in the chest is back, that feeling that I’m not doing enough, that I’m not creating enough, that I’m wasting such valuable time as I’ll never have again. Hedonism has become dull, a chore, a worn out play-thing destined for the bottom of the toy chest. All the playing is a nice distraction from life when I’m stressed and stupid and trying to avoid my feelings (as I’ve been doing since the beginning of February), but when I’m not really avoiding anything all the hedonism does is inspire feelings of guilt and shame. Loss? I don’t know. Maybe that’s too strong a word. It makes me feel bad and dumb.

After cranking out the piece for Hunter earlier this year and my subsequent rejection, there has been this tiny little whisper in my brain chanting its disheartening mantra of “Fuck it,” which is a terrible attitude to seeping through your subconscious. Astute Black Laserites will notice that I’ve posted nary a single photo all year. It’s May. You’ll also notice that I’ve not posted any other writing besides the Hunter piece. And that I’ve made ZERO progress on the three music videos I’ve assigned myself for this year. Pathetic. This year’s theme is flailing around, begging for attention, and I can’t seem to muster it. What is my deal? I’m trading my work time for play time as a way to rebound, but it’s not having the affect it should. Quite the opposite, I think.

With this warm weather anxiety firmly gripping my chest, I’ve been thinking of a few simple ways to change things up, to put my brain into a different place. Let’s explore, shall we?

  • Buy a bicycle – I really want one. I think it would be nice to have one to ride around on in the summer time. On the other hand, it’s been 15 years since I’ve ridden a bicycle regularly and riding one around NY scares me more than a little. It’s something I need to overcome.
  • Lose a little weight – Nothing drastic. Just a little. I could stand a little definition. It will help me feel better, no doubt. I don’t really know how to do this, but maybe the bike will help.
  • Read more – This is another weird thing. I think I’ve read maybe 2 or 3 books this year? Again, it’s May. That is a surprisingly low number for me. I like reading a lot. It makes my brain function better and helps me write.
  • Work less – I’ve been working nonstop since October and I’m ready not to work for a little. I can afford it. Thankfully, most of June and parts of July and August I’ll not be working. Super.
  • Pick up the guitar again – It’s been a million years since I owned and played a guitar regularly. I’d like to get one again and flex that part of my brain so long dormant.

All in all, not an insurmountable list. With any measure of diligence I should be able to accomplish these things and they will open the flood gates of my brain so that I might be able to get some damned work done when I’m not working. What is this crazy work compulsion I feel about? Weird. Anyway, I’d like to work more.

And lest this come off as some whiny bitch and moan session (it’s not intended to be), here’s something I find inspirational.

Stephen Hawking to Humanity: You Idiots, I’ll Show You How To Build A God Damned Time Machine.

It’s science Monday, Black Laserites, and I have another super sweet science thing to ramble on about! A few days ago Stephen Hawking wrote a piece for the Daily Mail about building a practical time machine. I’ve always liked Hawking’s writing; he has a tremendous strength for explaining seemingly bewildering scientific theories with examples helping them make sense to lay people such as myself. If you’ve ever read A Brief History of Time you know what I mean. The part where he explains why we experience time the way we do? Wild!

So, the jist of the article is that to time travel, we’d need to be moving at relativistic speeds and that time moves more quickly in space and that you could never travel backward but with a wormhole you could travel forward and that a black hole would do it or a space train and that science is fucking wild, man. But you should read the article for yourself. He’s smarter than I am and does a better job of explaining it.

Anyone out there want to help me build a Large Hadron Collider to get this whole time machine business off the ground? Of course, anyone hoping for a flux capacitored DeLorean to travel back in time and hang out with your dad who is Crispin Glover is going to be a little disappointed. Hawking isn’t really talking about science fictiony time machines (damn), but about time dilation caused by moving through space at nearly the speed of light which is still pretty cool. Not AS cool, though.

Still, the article is worth a read. Check it out.

Another thought: “quantum foam” is an awesome band name.

Has it ever occurred to you that we live in the future?

I was reading an article on Ars.Technica about some progress being made in the methods by which data are written to a hard disk. Currently, hard disk manufacturers have hit a plateau in data density on a disk. That is, because hard drives are physical objects, data require physical space on them. There’s a reason you can’t fit hundreds of billions of petabytes on the 2.5″ hard disk in your laptop: there just isn’t enough physical space. A few years ago, they developed perpendicular writing which resulted in a jump in hard drive capacities as manufacturers figured out how to work with it and to utilize it fully. But things have slowed down again, so science is looking for the next thing.

Some super smart scientists recently published a paper outlining various methods that could increase data density on a hard disk from a few hundred gigabits per inch to a terabit per inch. That’s a hell of an increase, with the assumption that “few” is more than two but less than five. And remember, bit ≠ byte. 8 bits is 1 byte. So a terabit is really only 128 gigabytes. Powers of 2 for the win.

I know this is all riveting stuff for you guys, and, really, I’m not going to spend time explaining how a hard drive works or what the methods they’ve described are. You can read the article if you want that.

No, the whole point of this arose when I read the next passage.

The next front runner in data storage density and type is far from clear—for example, a method that involved electron quantum holography was able to store 35 bits per electron, and various solid state technologies continue to vie for attention—but this combined bit-pattern and thermally-assisted magnetic recording seems sufficiently close to current hard disk drives to be viable.

What the holy hell? Electron Quantum Holography? Thermally-assisted Magnetic Recording? Storing bits of data as ELECTRONS? If you have ever wondered before, we live in the future. It is now and it is awesome! It makes me think of Clarke’s Third Law that “any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.”

You know what’s weird?

How quickly babies grow. Remember this adorable little peanut?

Of course you do. She’s adorable. How could you not? Well, just look at this photo sent to me this morning by my brother.

What, is she dressed up for a night on the town? Gonna take the Beemer out for a spin, are ya kid? Where the hell have I been? Although the growth of babies has got to be one of the most mundane things in life, consider my mind blown.

Meet my friend Tessie, who I hope to be able to address as my Tony Award Winning friend Tessie soon.

This is my friend Tessie.

Tessie and I went to high school together in California and reconnected a couple years ago here in New York when we discovered we both lived and worked here. She is a costume designer working on Broadway in various musicals and theatrical productions. She works hard and has done well for herself. I am constantly impressed. Currently she’s working on a show called Lend Me A Tenor. Sweet pun.

So, upon hearing of her Tony Nomination this morning, I felt tremendous pride in my friend. For those of you who don’t know what the Tony Awards are—and, really, what the hell?—they are the theatre’s equivalent of the Academy Awards. It’s a big deal to be nominated for a Tony Award.

Here’s a screencap of the nomination.

See her show there? I know you do. So do I. Great, right?

The awards aren’t until June, so we’ll all have to wait until we find out that they won for Best Costume Design. Not “if”, mind you. That.

Good job, Tessie!