These were floating around a few years ago, but never made it to The Black Laser. Well, the time is now!

Presented here for your viewing displeasure are three training videos created by Wendy’s in what looks like the early 90s. And my god are they terrible. They just reek of corporations raping popular culture turning things that were once cool (old school hip hop) into things that are really really not (rapping about sodas for a training video). And for Wendy’s to think that singing soulfully about adding cheese to chili is the best way to reach their new employees is pretty offensive too.

Yet, I love these things. The people in them are just so earnest. The guy and chick in the hot drinks and cold drinks videos respectively just feel like young, starving actors who got their first real job and are so psyched to be there that they could be asked to do anything and they’d do it. It’s kind of endearing, I think. I mean, watch the videos and tell me you won’t be humming the frankly awful songs the rest of the day. Try it. Go ahead. I dare you.