Oh, you’ve been to Europe? Boring. Do you want to read the intro paragraph for the most killer obituary I’ve ever read?

Sure you do.

At 17, he was living with natives in the South American jungle and, like them, wore a loincloth, got traditional tattoos, ate monkey and danced with the gods. He fell in love with a beautiful young woman, Mina, who reciprocated. They married. She soon died of malaria, and the young man pondered suicide.

Right? That makes all your vacations to warm places seem utterly banal, doesn’t it?

Read the rest of the obituary on The New York Times. This guy was epic.